Dance Machine

"Dance Machine, watch me get down, watch me get down"....................................

We went to our next doctors appointment today for a Nuchal Translucency Test. Essentially they check to make sure your baby is not at risk for downs syndrome or other chromosomal disorders. They do this by taking blood and doing a sonogram. The sonogram is done so they can measure the amount of fluid in the baby's neck. Luckily, everything looked good on the sonogram and the blood tests came back showing a very miniscule chance of anything being wrong. We thought they would give us a yes or no answer, but they can only give you a ratio and our ratio was like one in over two hundred thousand. The fun part about this doctor appointment is that we get to see little B-Dub on the sonogram for an extended period of time and they videotape it for us.

Yeah, videotape. I didnt even know they made those anymore. I thought they have been retired to the technology heap along with 8-Tracks, Beta Cassettes, Video Discs, and horrible pauly shore movies (except for Encino Man, a quality cinematic masterpiece.............."San Dimas High Rules!"). Well, they have the ability to video tape your baby as part of the sonogram machine. Traci and I were not missing out on the first movie of little b-dub. The morning before the appointment, I went on a hunt to find the last remaining video cassette available. I first tried Wolf Camera. They had a 6 pack available. I bet they sell a ton of those. The only person that still buys that many video tapes must be Joe Bob to tape reruns of Hee Haw on his black and white TV with rabbit ears. Who the hell needs that many video tapes? So, on to the next store. I walk into CVS and ask the kid behind the desk if they sell single video tapes. He looked at me like I had two heads or if I just asked him to recite the Gettysburg address. I tried to explain that they go in VCRs and you can record shows. His response was, "Dude, we dont sell Tivos at CVS. Try Best Buy down the street." After rolling my eyes, I walked to the camera section and found a lone single video tape.........Jackpot!

The tech that conducted the sonogram was laughing at how I was stuggling to open the plastic shrink wrap. I cant stand that stuff, it is impossible to open! I guess Im not the only one who buys a tape right before the appointment because she said that it usually takes most of the 'Dads to be' about 5 minutes to get it open. After throwing the tape across the room a few times, dropping a few 'f bombs', and profusely sweating, I finally unwrapped the technological fossil. She put it in the machine and it was movie time.

It was amazing. You can see everything. The little one has fingers, toes, lips, everything. And, little b dub has my rythym. The baby was dancing all over Traci's belly. He or She showed us the moonwalk, some breakdancing , and disco moves that put John Travolta to shame. It is crazy and amazing to see. Of course, we couldnt wait to show our family our baby's first home movie and dance off. As soon as I can figure out how to put it up on You Tube, I will let everyone know so they can see it. The tech also informed us that the size of the baby puts the due date up to November 27th. We might get lucky and little b-dub might be born on my birthday. I cant wait and then we can both start training for 'Dancing with the Stars'.